Travel Blog

Here’s some advice from a fellow monger: Beware the advice of your fellow mongers. Including me.

Sometimes you get lucky and get a good tip. A couple of times I have been given info about specific chicas that turned out to be totally ‘on the money.’ One was an older spinner who wore her hair in a mullet, which made me think ‘lesbian.’ Definitely not, though, and an absolute doll overall. Another regarded a statuesque beauty who hung out at the Key Largo in San Jose. A fellow monger told me she was both good and would happily accompany mi for a modest amount.
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Other, more general advice misses the mark often enough to be useless in some cases, or counter productive in the worst cases. To give one example, many mongers will tell you NEVER pay in advance. If I had followed that advice to the letter, I would have missed some very nice experiences. Not all chicas are worried about not getting paid, but plenty have been ‘stiffed’ by customers and their distrust is as reasonable as yours is. It’s your call. And theirs.

A rule of the thumb you can go by is that the more general the advice, the less likely it will be universally true. When I was in San Jose, I was told to avoid Colombians. It was somewhat true that they often had a higher asking price. But I have had great times with Colombians. Somebody else told me that Dominicans were always hot. Well, I will say that I have had some great sessions with Dominicanas, no question. But nationality is not a slam dunk any more than the color of her underwear.

Bottom line: The more general the advice, the less reliable. The more specific, the more dependable.

I wish that advice didn’t sound so general…
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I’m not talking about ordinary houses here, I’m sure you know. Now there are a few that actually call themselves “massage parlors” or “spas” but the general idea is that there are a number of ladies inside these places waiting for a guy like you (or unlike you if you don’t show up) to engage her in some hanky panky in exchange for a modest sum.

They tend to be somewhat clustered in the Candelaria district of central Medellin, though a few others are scattered about the city… in Laureles, Belen, Itagui and such. Most gringos prefer the downtown casas because they are concentrated in a nice small area and you can easily visit 5 places in a walk of a couple of blocks.

Normally, the guys have a favorite place or two, though there are some who enjoy scouting out multiple places, looking for new “faces,” or maybe not faces? Whatever,

The traditional way things are done here is that when you enter and sit down (or not) the manager will call for a “presentation,” which consists of every unoccupied girl in the place coming out and introducing themselves. Normally this includes the girl giving you a cursory hand shake and telling you her name. This seems quite simple, but the trick is remembering who it was you liked best, her name, that is. I remember a guy who used to go on daytime talk shows, Harry Loraine, who used to be able to memorize everybody in the audience’s name at one go. I’m guessing that’s not you. It sure ain’t me.

My method is to only attempt to remember a name when the chica is more appealing than all those before her. That way you only have to really remember one name at a time.

So there you go, pro tip of the week.
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One of my pastimes is browsing the escort ads here in Medellin. Of course Medellin isn’t the only city with such ads, but they are about as uncensored as could be imagined. There is no pretense about what is being offered, and what is required to purchase what is being offered. On the other hand, as I think about it, there IS some pretense regarding what is being offered.

At the most basic level, though, it’s pretty straightforward. The seller is offering sex for money. But much like the legendary used car salesman, the sales pitch may not be reliable. Sure, the salesman is offering you a ’97 Hyundai, and you can see that. But you can certainly be excused if you don’t believe it is a one owner car, owned by a little old lady from Bakersfield who only used it to drive back and forth to the grocery store once a week.

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Likewise, when reading an ‘adult’ advertisement, a healthy skepticism is called for. For example, it isn’t possible that every single working girl gives the best oral in the country. I mean, was there some kind of contest somewhere? I obviously missed it if there was. Who were the judges? How much did they pay to BE the judges? I am going to take a wild guess and say there never was such a contest. Call me a cynic.

So that brings me to the topic of the day. It’s pretty common to see these chicas describing themselves as nymphomaniacs or insatiable. I have a fair amount of experience, if I may say so, and almost all women I have been with have been willing to let me stop after a) they had their usual # of orgasms (1 and 0 being the most common #s) or b) some agreed upon time limit, with a half hour or full hour being the most common.

All that being said, I have run into a few ladies who come close to being insatiable. Magdalena, the subject of my biographical novel, was (and is) capable of double digit orgasms, and usually only wants to quit when her body starts to give out. I met another, recently, who was about as close to insatiable as could be imagined. She would only quit when she had to leave to get back home to cook dinner or get the kid to school. Sadly, as sexual as she was, she wasn’t that good. Her enthusiasm was unmatched, but her style wasn’t what I like. Plus, she tried to steal a credit card. Nobody’s perfect.

Last and least is the truly insatiable type, which is to say, non-orgasmic, EVER. Of course we can never know that it’s not US that isn’t getting the job done, but I have met several women who say they never climax. Never have and never will. Maybe that’s the kind of ‘insatiable’ some of the escorts are referring to. Maybe they aren’t lying after all!

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